Tourism Jokes

As a Delta Air Lines jet was flying over Arizona on a clear day,the copilot was providing his passengers with a running commentary about landmarks over the PA system. "Coming up on the right, you can see the Meteor Crater, which is a major tourist attraction in northern Arizona. It was formed whena lump of nickel and iron, roughly 150 feet in diameter and weighing 300,000 tons, struck the earth at about 40,000 miles an hour, scattering white-hot debris for miles in every direction. The hole measures nearly a mile across and is 570 feet deep." From the cabin, a passenger was heard to exclaim, "Wow! It just missed the highway!"

I was driving down a lonely country road one cold winter day when it began to sleet pretty heavily. My windows were getting icy and my wiper blades were badly worn and quickly fell apart under the strain.

Unable to drive any further because of the ice building up on my front window I suddenly had a great idea. I stopped and began to overturn large rocks until I located two very lethargic hibernating rattle snakes. I grabbed them up, straightened them out flat and installed them on my blades and they worked just fine.

What! You've never heard of . . . wind chilled vipers?

From the Arizona Republic, May 7 (lead story on front page):

"Arizona is banking on a new slogan to lure millions of visitors and their dollars to the state.

"It's 'Arizona--One Grand Adventure After Another.'" "The slogan, picked from more than 20,000 entries, in a contest sponsored by the Arizona Office of Tourism, was announced Wednesday."[it goes on, but here are some of the losers:]

Arizona--Bring your camera and your Grandma
Arizona--Come on vacation, Leave on probation
Arizona--A Yucca Minute
Arizona--You Never Have to Shovel Sunshine
Arizona--Where you can Have a Dirt Lawn and it's OK
Arizona--Come see it, Pilgrim
Arizona has the hots for you
Arizona--The Happy Jumping Cholla State
Get your AZ over here
Hug a zonie
Arizona--The Zippy Zone
Arizona--It will Thaw Your Chilis
Arizona--Sunny with Scattered Flowers
Arizona--Better than the State You're In
Arizona--It's not Kansas and it Never was

The winner won a free houseboat vacation on Lake Powell, most of which is in Utah.